Mommies Paradise

As I read the volumes of information circulating regarding the upheaval of Roe vs. Wade as well as the equally horrifying wave of efforts to eliminate access to contraception, I have come across a provoking question. This article in particular posed this question. What is a woman’s role in the world?

When I decided to write about this question I had a million ideas about what to say, but as I actually attempt to put it all together I realize that it is a daunting question. Where does one begin? I guess, at the beginning.

As far back as 2500 BCE Ku-baba ruled the Mesopotamian City-State of Ur and she appears to be the first recorded female ruler. It is believed that there have always been female rulers including Egyptian queens (dating back to 3000 BCE) as well as female religious leaders who, incidentally kept eunuchs as willing hand servants. Early religions (BC) were based on the belief in a feminine creator of some sort and included the idea of a birth and death cycle. Before Christianity and subsequently Islam, women represented these different aspects of life. Not only as the great giver of life, but also as the ultimate taker of life. These goddesses were not sweet, maternal, nubile creatures and many were believed to be fierce, vengeful smiters of injustice as well as benevolent grantors of death.

Women still had families and gave birth to children. They did these things willingly. In some cultures these women were the mothers to several children from different men. They had the choice to do so. In these cultures the role of the woman was to (in no specific order) give birth if they chose to, lead if necessary, administer to the sick or dying, deliver children, help with hunting and harvesting, and go to war. Our role was to be a community member.

With the development of Christianity and the patriarchy in the western world, women were denigrated to a place of subservience and slavery. Men used religion and brawn to change the tide. We were ushered into the slots they assigned. The maiden, the mother, and the crone. Oh, and let’s not forget the whore. Only the wealthy were educated. And that education was mostly limited to basic reading, writing and numbers. But a grand emphasis was placed on spinning, weaving, needlepoint and stitching. If any girl yearned for more, she would have to be crafty. Ultimately, emphasis was placed on smiling coyly, and quietly. It was important to excel in the “fairer arts” so that these women would be attractive as possible brides to be used as barter for land and livestock. It is important to understand that this trade took place as soon as possible, once a girl was of child-bearing age. This could be 12 years old. After she was married, any woman/girl (rich or poor) was worth her weight in gold if she could deliver male children. If she were a queen she would be delivering to her husband and subjects, a possible heir to the throne. If she were not royalty, she would be delivering an additional worker to the family. Girl children were viewed as a liability if they were born to the common folk.

The choice to give birth and with whom was taken from us. Our ability to rule was removed. Our role as health care provider was condemned as heresy and thus ripped from us. All of these things were taken from us in the name of religion. A patriarchal religion, which decided that women were incapable of anything, really. We could still deliver children, but I think that is because men didn’t want to do it nor could they figure out how. Ultimately, our role in these times was one of currency and as subsequent bearer of children. Boys only, please!

And has our role changed? Are we viewed differently now? In some developed nations, possibly. In other developed areas of the world, not so much.

This story is not over. More to follow.

Three things that bug the crap out of me. Magicians are just manipulators. Mimes are boring… say something already! I have only seen one mime that I found even remotely entertaining named Billy the Mime and he was in The Aristocrats. And clowns are scary in a “Hey, Uncle Boffo has been in the sherry again, don’t leave him alone with with kids,” kind of way. I mean why are clowns sad? They are clowns for Jesus sake! Ten of them can fit in a car!! Sheesh! I digress.

This guy is kind of like all three rolled into one painful excuse for entertainment. Back when he had his lame little specials on the TV whereby he strolled around some unsuspecting city and accosted innocent citizens with his easily deciphered trickery mesmerized the masses with his magic, I thought Hey, that isn’t magic — it is like fortune telling. He just finds people who WANT to believe he didn’t just wipe dirt on their sweaty hand while they were looking deeply into his eyes, and then tell them it was magic. But I figured, whatever. He too shall pass.

Then a couple of months later he was on the TV again. Doing the same shit! And I thought how does this guy get a show? He is doing the same stuff as before. Wearing the same damn outfit, no less! But this time he is in a NEW city. Woooo. Oh, wait. He “levitated” this time. BUT, he would only levitate for special suckers people. And only if they stood behind him.

Wha? Uh, okay. Are we supposed to be looking at your ass? And then he would “levitate.” Or, lift himself up on the tip of one of his feet, I’m not sure. And the camera never showed under his feet. Just a view of his ass. Fine, I figured. He is just a huckster and there have to be some of these people on the street that call him on this bull****. And they are the reason we have the editing room.

Then this clown showed up again. Thankfully, not to put cigarettes out on people’s hands anymore. However he was going to be sitting in a glass box that he would have to fold himself up to get into. And it may have been on the Eiffel tower? And the box hung over the side? I don’t know. I think there was some sort of loss of oxygen issue here. Not sure. He did wear the same black pants. No shirt this time. Maybe the shirt was in the cleaners? I don’t know. I never watched the show. I have the right to that choice, too.

Apparently, he survived the “Ooh, I’m in a box” stunt (see Mime) because he has a new special on the TV in a week or two.

He is going to hold his breath under water.
Can He Do It Ladies and Gentlemen?

Well, umm, has he been practicing? I mean, isn’t that his job? To practice surviving? I guess he sort of did that ‘hold his breath in a box’ thing a while back and didn’t die. He could probably do it this time too.

Now, watching a guy under water, holding his breath for nine minutes really does sound like riveting TV watching. For about maybe three minutes. However, does the show need to be two hours? I am thinking ten minutes, max. It would go something like this: 30 second intro, 9 minutes of underwater guy, some fish swim by, we go get a snack, he dies/survives!, 30 seconds of sobbing/congratulations! That seems about it to me. I didn’t even include a commercial.

But No. Two. Hours. Of this guy. Doing “magic.” Hey! And aren’t these stunts?

When Houdini escaped from the tank of water nobody saw how he did it. He just appeared, soaking wet, and so it seemed like Magic. If people watch you escape from the straight-jacket and then swim out of the tank it becomes a Stunt.

The weird thing is that a lot of people want to watch Blaine hold his breath. Or else he wouldn’t get TWO HOURS to talk about doing just that, peppered with some sleight of hand and “levitating” I’m sure.

I honestly can’t stop laughing every time I see the commercial for this show! And the laughing isn’t that good jovial, Wow! That was comic genius! kind of laugh either. It is that maniacal, Oh My God! Is this what we have come to? kind of laugh.